Slap Shot » Quotes (Movie)

Reggie Dunlop: And remember I went up to your room afterwards and you were dressed in chick's clothes? Yeah, you had on this black bra with tassels! You were dancing in front of a mirror with this kinda zebra skin jockstrap.
McGrath: Bitch!
Reggie Dunlop: Remember how I screamed at you when you started coming on to me? And I just said 'Jesus stop it Joe, I'm ashamed of you!'
McGrath: Goddamn you.
Reggie Dunlop: I wanted to tell you I forgot the whole thing. Years have passed, now I'm sexually liberated. I don't care who's a fag no more. I mean who cares? It's natural, it's all around us.
Reggie Dunlop: Who's the owner Joe?

Reggie Dunlop: What are you guys doing?
Steve Hanson: Puttin' on the foil!
Jeff Hanson: Every game!
Jack Hanson: Yeah, you want some?

Jeff Hanson: Eddie Shore?
McGrath: Piss on Eddie Shore.
Steve Hanson: Old-time hockey?
McGrath: Piss on old-time hockey!

Shirley Upton: Johnny always says you can just drink so much and screw so much.

Jim Carr: Well I may be bald, but at least I'm not chickenshit like you!

(Reggie is trying to get his pre-game nap)
McGrath: Are you nuts? A bounty? We could all end up in the clinker for this. You can't put a bounty on a man's head.
Reggie Dunlop: Bullshit. I just did.
(Hangs up, Phone rings again)
Dave 'Killer' Carlson: Coach, I want that hundred dollars.
Reggie Dunlop: Ya gotta earn it, Killer.
Dave 'Killer' Carlson: My attitude's right.

Ned Braden: Now, they give you one phone call. See they book you, and then the give you one phone call.
Jack Hanson: Call the pizza man!
Morris Wanchuk: Why dontcha call a massage parlor!

Lily Braden: What's the story on that dog?
Reggie Dunlop: That's the dog that saved Charleston from the 1938 flood.
Lily Braden: Well fuck him.

(afterthe Hansons join the team)
Johnny Upton: They're fuckin' horrible-lookin'.

(after meeting the Hansons)
Reggie Dunlop: Oh you cheap son of a bitch. Are you crazy? Those guys are retards!
McGrath: I got a good deal on those boys. The scouts said they showed a lot of promise.
Reggie Dunlop: They brought their fuckin' TOYS with 'em!
McGrath: Well, I'd rather have em playin with their toys than playin with themselves
Reggie Dunlop: They're too dumb to play with themselves. Boy, every piece of garbage that comes into the market and you gotta buy it!
McGrath: Reg, Reg, that reminds me. I was coachin' in Omaha in 1948 and Eddie Shore sends me this guy who was a terrible masturbator, you know, couldn't control himself. Why, he would get deliberate penalties so he could get over in the penalty box all by himself and damned if he wouldn't... you know...

Reggie Dunlop: She underlines the fuck scenes for ya? Jesus, if she underlines the fuck scenes for ya, she must worship the ground you walk on.
Ned Braden: They teach you how to underline in college.
Reggie Dunlop: Not the fuck scenes, they don't. Braden, you gotta learn to put out more, you know what I mean?

Tim McCracken: Dunlop, you suck cock.
Reggie Dunlop: All I can get.

Reggie Dunlop: Goddamn lard-ass Barkley Donaldson, I'm tellin' you he jumped us!
Steve Hanson: (nodding head) Mm huh.
Reggie Dunlop: Gloves off, stick down, no warning, he challenged the Chiefs!
Steve Hanson: Called us names!
Reggie Dunlop: Called us names! But Dave was there.
Steve Hanson: Dave's a killer!
Johnny Upton: Dave's a mess.
Reggie Dunlop: But Dave's out. Who's gonna take his place?
Ned Braden: Is the answer Jesus?
Reggie Dunlop: (looks at the Hanson brothers) Ok guys. Show us what you got.

Johnny Upton: Jesus, what did the old man trade for these assholes, a used puck bag?

Ned Braden: You take the van, I'll keep the dog.