House M.D. » Pilot » Quotes (Episode)

Dr. Gregory House: Gorgeous women do *not* go to medical school... unless, they're as damaged as they are beautiful.

Melanie Landon: Pretty much everybody I like is five years old.

schoolgirl: (Referring to her teacher's weekend) How come we always tell you what we did, and you never tell us what you did?

Dr. Gregory House: Everybody lies.

Dr. Gregory House: (after questioning House's treatment plan for a patient) Why are you so afraid of making a mistake?
Dr. Lisa Cuddy: Because I'm a doctor. Because when we make mistakes people die.

Dr. Gregory House: Not many people get to experience muscle death.
Rebecca Adler: Did you think you were dying?
Dr. Gregory House: I hoped I was dying.

Dr. Gregory House: Oxygen is so important during those prepubescent years, don't you think?

Dr. Lisa Cuddy: (to a patient, about House) I'm your doctor. You've been good to me and good to this hospital, of course I care, but I don't see how this conversation could end well for me. Either your wife is having an affair, or she's not having an affair, and you're coming here because you rightly think I should fire him. But I can't, even if it costs me your money. The son-on-a-bitch is the best doctor we have.

Dr. Gregory House: You can live with Dignity, you can't die with it...

Dr. Lisa Cuddy: Your reputation won't last if you don't do your job. The clinic is part of your job. I want you to do your job.
Dr. Gregory House: But as the philosopher Jagger once said, "You can't always get what you want".

Dr. Eric Foreman: I thought everybody lies?
Dr. Gregory House: Truth begins in lies.

Rebecca Adler: I just want to die with a little dignity.
Dr. Gregory House: There's no such thing! Our bodies break down, sometimes when we're 90, sometimes before we're even born, but it always happens and there's never any dignity in it! I don't care if you can walk, see, wipe your own ass... it's always ugly - ALWAYS! You can live with dignity; you can't die with it!

Dr. Gregory House: The truth begins in lies.

(to the pharmacist; about to play a trick on a patient)
Dr. Gregory House: I need thirty-six Vicodin and change for a dollar.

Rebecca Adler: Am I ever going to meet Dr. House?
Dr. James Wilson: Maybe at the theater or the grocery store.
Rebecca Adler: Is he a good man?
Dr. James Wilson: He's a good... doctor.
Rebecca Adler: Can you be one without the other? Don't you have to care about people?
Dr. James Wilson: Caring is a good motivation. He's found something else.