Lilly: I've got a secret, a good one.
Veronica: Is that lasagna I smell?
Keith: Keith Mars' secret recipe.
Veronica: You double the cheese. Your secret is out... You're making salad? I know pity cooking when I see it. There must be more bad news.
Keith: Maybe we should wait 'til after dinner, huh?
Veronica: Spill it. I promise I won't let it ruin my appetite.
Veronica: I hate fake deer, too. Everytime I see their stupid fake deer faces I wanna grab a shotgun and go all Cheney on 'em.
Veronica: J. Geils was right. Love stinks. You can dress it up in sequins and shoulder pads, but one way or another, you're just gonna end up alone at the spring dance strapped in uncomfortable underwear.
Logan: F.Y.I.? If cuddling is the best part, he didn't do it right.
Lamb: Hey, what do you say we do your Miranda Rights in harmony this time? I'll take lead. You take tenor?
Logan: Is it still called déjà vu when something happens more than twice, or is that something different? I'll have to look that up
Veronica: Nobody likes a blonde in a hamster ball.
Veronica: Am I naked? Because in my nightmares I'm usually naked.
Veronica: Hey, Carrie, wait up!
Carrie Bishop: (sarcastically) Why? Did you want the chance to tell me how much you admired me for my brave stand?
Veronica: I want to give you a chance to recant before I prove you're lying.
Carrie Bishop: Why do you even care?
Veronica: There aren't many great teachers. Mr. Rooks is one of them.
Carrie Bishop: Yeah, if you can get past the part where he seduces his students.
Veronica: Hey, Carrie, this is me, Veronica. I know you.
Carrie Bishop: You're so naive.
Veronica: Yeah, that's me, naive.
Gia Goodman: Wow. How mission impossible. I feel like at any moment Tom Cruise is going to dangle from the ceiling on cables.
Veronica: Great. Now I won't be able to sleep. I hope he doesn't try to marry me.
Veronica: (voiceover discussing her date rape) You want to know how I lost my virginity? So do I.
Rebecca James: You know it sounds like you blame Veronica.
Logan: No, Veronica was my friend too. If she hadn't ratted me out, then Lilly and I would have stayed together. And Lilly wouldn't have been alone that day. I would have been there. So yeah I blame Veronica... and I blame myself for being stupid and I blame Lilly for being a bitch that week.
Rebecca James: You know there is another way of looking at this, Logan. If you'd still been together, then you'd have been dead too.
Logan: And what is so great about living?
Jackson Douglas: I hear you do detective stuff for people.
Veronica: I do favors for friends.
Jackson Douglas: I can pay.
Veronica: Sit down, friend.
Pauline Elliot: I know exactly who stole him. It was those damn PHAT kids!
Veronica: 'Cause I take it monkeys are delicious?
Trina: Will you just hear me out, please? My boyfriend Dylan spotted me some cash a few months ago and now he's bugging me about it. I can't get him off my back.
Logan: Did you try standing up?
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