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(last lines) Billy McMahon: Hell of a summer, bud. Nick Campbell: Hell of a summer.

Nick Campbell: Wh-Why did you bring me over to introduce me to this guy? It's like he was your best friend. You introduced me to Hitler.

Billy McMahon: Look who grew an eyebrow, Yo-Yo!

Billy McMahon: (first time as a Google Tech Support agent) And I want to have you get out there, salsa'ing and grinding up against a complete stranger that you don't even know, having a pretty good time doin' some wrong things. Okay? Are we on the same page?

Billy McMahon: Nick? Would I be wrong to call you my brother? Nick Campbell: Of course not, I'd do anything for my little show pony. Look at me, anything. Billy McMahon: I need you to ice my balls for me.

Nick Campbell: (toasting Yo-Yo's first alcoholic drink) To the night you'll never remember!

Billy McMahon: That being said, if you want something cold to drink, we'll hook you up. Stuart: I'm ok, thank you. Just please, stop talking to me. Billy McMahon: I'm your Bill Holden in Stalag 17. Stuart: I don't even... I really don't get that reference. Billy McMahon: Google it. Stuart: Alright...

Billy McMahon: Whoa, guys, where's all this hostility coming from? Stuart: Where do you think it's coming from, you big tree. Two fifths of our team is made up of two old guys who don't know shit.

Billy McMahon: (to Kevin) Me and you are the same height. Kevin, Matress Salesman: (shakes head dismissively) We're not the same height. We're not the same height. I'm handsome tall - you're the type of tall where, you walk through the airport, people stop what they're eating and look at you. You're like a freak.

(first lines) Nick Campbell: What the shit is this? Why is this on the get psyched mix? Billy McMahon: Because I gotta throw you a curve-ball every now and again, or you get bored, and the mix doesn't have its intended effect. Nick Campbell: No, I want to get rev'd up, and this song's not doing it. Billy McMahon: Oh, really? I defy you to crush this chorus and not get psyched. Nick Campbell: Not gonna happen. Billy McMahon: Don't ya think? (cranks up the volume and Nick actually starts singing along)

Graham Hawtrey: William, William, what have you done?

Lyle: Can we talk about the on the line thing for a minute?

Nick Campbell: People want to work with people. Nick and Billy's Boss: People hate people!

Neha: I've only read about this stuff, okay? Craigslist casual encounters, Twilight fanfiction, hentai. Nick Campbell: What's hentai? Neha: Japanese comic books where the women get penetrated by octopus tentacles.

Nick and Billy's Boss: Face it, where you're goin', you've already been.

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