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Mel: Richie, do you have any kids?
Richie: Never had a date.
Mel: Clark?
Clark: Never spoke to a girl.
Mel: Gu-Gus?
Gus: Ugh, My wife and I are kinda working on it.

Clark: (where someone has recently farted) Oh! I love beef stew!

Richie: (after Salad Girl gives back a video) Well, I am management, so I'm gonna waive the late fee.
Salad Girl: Oh, they're not late, but thank you.
(Richie laughs nervously)

(Carlos is drinking a tequilla while pitching)
Carlos: Maria? Why did you leave me?
Mel: Letting that 12 year old drink like that is disgusting.

Mel: If you build it, nerds will come.

Gretchen Peterson: Move your ass Richie!

Clark: (a ball hits Richie in the head) Duuuuhhhr!
Richie: You just lost your membership at video world!
Clark: Dang it!

Mel: Howie, you're a freak.

Richie: Clark! You kissed a girl before I did?
Clark: This is way better than macaroni!

Brad: You guys think you're athletes now?
Richie: Haha that's funny I didn't know ath-e-letes had three syllables... thats ama-za-zaing.

Richie: He just did that steroid free!
Clark: What's steroids?
Richie: Something that makes your 'pee-pee' smaller.
Clark: Ohh... there must be steroids in macaroni!

(last lines)
Mel: This was a total waste of time, wasn't it?
Gus: Yeah.

Howie: Richie told me about the serial killers thats loose in in our neighborhood killing anyone named Howie! THAT'S MY NAME! That's my name!

Brad: Bring it!
Clark: Suck it!

Mel: Reggie and I met at Tuba Camp when we were kids
(shows picture of Reggie and Himself playing their tubas when they were younger)
Gus: HAHA,Reggie that was you?
Reggie Jackson: (angrily) What are you laughing about?I was a cute kid.
Gus: (frightened) Oh,uh,Yes.Like a young Denzel.
Richie: (whispered to Clark) I didn't know Denzel played Erkel.

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