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Screech: You girls are lucky; wait 'til you see me in a wet t-shirt. Lisa: Only if it involves you drowning.

Zack: (Screech brings Zack to the school old radio station in the basement of the school) Hey, Screech, I thought I knew every hiding place in this school. How did you find it? Screech: Oh, a bully dumped me down the garbage chute. Someday I'm gonna get even with that girl.

Lisa: (Talking about Slater's sport's broadcast on the radio) Do you think we should be honest and tell him he stinks? Jessie: How can we without hurting his feelings? Screech: Why don't we just wave a skunk in front of him?

Zack: (Talking about bringing back the school's old radio station with Mr. Belding) Sir, we'd like to put KKTY back on the air. Mr. Belding: What? Screech: (slowly) We... would... like... to Mr. Belding: I heard you!

Alan Fairbanks: Why should I join the cadet corp? Zack: Because the new Army serves cake at every meal. Alan Fairbanks: Slice me in!

Mr. Belding: I am fed up with your wisecracks. I'm giving you a month's worth of Saturday detention. Zack: Four Saturdays? Mr. Belding: Uh-uh, 30 Saturdays. Zack: 30 Saturdays? Sir, can we negotiate? Hey I'll wash your car. Mr. Belding: The last time you washed my car, you flooded the inside. Zack: Car pool, sir.

Kelly: (Lisa hands Kelly and Jessie bracelets) Here guys, these are for you. Kelly: Gee Thanks. Jessie: These are nice. Lisa: I made these friendship bracelets in Fashion Club. Screech: Did you make one for me? Lisa: For you, I'm making a friendship muzzle. Screech: I'm speechless. Lisa: That's the idea.

Kelly: (Kelly is talking about choosing between Zack and Slater) Kelly: Guys, this is hard. It's like choosing between two great pieces of chocolate. Zack: Sorry Kelly, from now on, you can only get zits from one of us.

Screech: Will you go to the prom with me? Lisa: Yeah, I'll go. Screech: You will! Lisa: I'll go with you when worms have ears.

Kelly: Is something wrong? Mr. Frank Kapowski: Afraid so. World peace broke out. Kelly: That's good isn't it? Mr. Frank Kapowski: For the world, yes, but not if you work at a defense plant.

Mr. Belding: Now Zack, I know that you and Lisa are in charge of decorations, but this year's theme is not going to be (holds up a banner) Mr. Belding: "Zack and Kelly's Prom".

Jessie: (Jessie and Slater are looking for music for the prom) I can't believe you like these tapes. Slater: Hey, what's wrong with Paula Abdul and Janet Jackson? Jessie: Their music doesn't say anything. Slater: Did you ever see them move? They're saying plenty, baby.

Zack: Kelly dumped me. Slater: Is that what you think? Zack: Yeah, I mean every time I call, her mother says she's washing her hair. I mean who washes their hair six times a day? Slater: You do.

Kelly: Why aren't you at the prom? Zack: Oh, is that tonight? Gosh, I must have forgotten? Kelly: There must have been 100 girls who would love to go with you. Zack: Actually 106.

Mr. Belding: (Mr. Belding just signed a detention slip for Zack) So, this makes nine, and 10 is... Zack: Don't say it, sir. Mr. Belding: That's right, suspension! It's gonna happen, Morris. Zack: Not until cows give Pepsi, sir.

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