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Plaintiff: I'm sorry, I'm very nervous.
Judge Judy: Well - get un-nervous.


Judge Judy: That must be the S.O.D.D.I. principle: "Some Other Dude Done It."


Judge Judy: Baloney!


(Judge Judy states her opinion of people who have themselves excessively tattooed)
Judge Judy: Yeah, well, I'm probably just very old-fashioned about this whole tattoo thing. I think that when people do that in excess, which clearly to me, there's, there are excesses. I would prefer that somebody say, "Look at me, look at me, this is what I've accomplished. I wrote a book. I graduated from college. I've just completed a wonderful work of art that I hung in a museum. Something that I've accomplished," rather than saying, "Look at me, look at me, I'm gonna be the most outlandish I can be so I can get your attention." There's positive attention, there's negative attention. But maybe there will come a point where being tattooed over your whole body is accepted. I will be long gone when that happens fortunately!


Judge Judy: ...Sir, the *table* didn't have three beers and then get up and move!


Judge Judy: If you want the facts, you go to a therapist. If you want the law, you come to court.


Judge Judy: Don't let the word "bar" fool you. This is a courtroom, not a barroom.


Judge Judy: What do you do for a living, Sir?
Defendant: Um...
Judge Judy: "Um" is not an answer! What kind of training did you need to do "Um"?


Judge Judy: (yelling) I don't believe you!


Judge Judy: I don't want you, or anybody else, to think I'm stupid. Old, maybe; stupid, never.


Judge Judy: I'm the boss, Applesauce.


Judge Judy: What do I know about football? Two things: it interferes with Sundays; and the players don't run around bases.


Judge Judy: Beauty fades. Dumb is forever.


Judge Judy: If it doesn't make sense, it's not true.


Judge Judy: You're gonna keep your mouth shut until I come to you and ask you a question; otherwise, Byrd will take you outside until you understand the rules. Because here, I'm in charge... I run this show. Do you understand? You don't speak until I speak to you. Or do you want me to label you a liar before we even begin?


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