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Ricky Ricardo: Lucy's actin' crazy. Fred Mertz: Crazy for Lucy, or crazy for ordinary people?

Ricky Ricardo: Look, all I know is that Columbus discovered Ohio in 1776.

(When Ethel doesn't return to California hotel suite) Fred Mertz: Let's just hope for the best. Lucy Ricardo: Don't worry, Fred, Ethel'll come back. Fred Mertz: I said let's hope for the BEST.

Lucy Ricardo: Ever since we said "I do", there have been so many things that we don't.

Lucy Ricardo: I want the names to be unique and euphonious. Ricky Ricardo: Okay. Unique if it's a boy, and Euphonious if it's a girl.

Lucy Ricardo: It's seventy-nine cents a pound. Customer: How can you sell meat so cheap? Lucy Ricardo: I'm glad you asked that. We rope, we brand, we butcher. We do everything but eat it for you. Seventy-nine cents a pound.

Fred Mertz: She said my mother looks like a weasel. Lucy Ricardo: Ethel, apologize. Ethel Mertz: I'm sorry your mother looks like a weasel.

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