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Max: Nobody even kissed. Thor: Well not in their mouths, at least.


Thor: Does this look like a sippy cup? No, it's a fucking juice box! Because I'm not a fucking child!


Hannah: This is what happens when you don't respect women. Lucas: I respect women. My mom's my best friend! Thor: What about me?


Benji: Hey stranger things go fuck yourselves!


Max: We need to get rid of the drugs. Thor: We can throw it in the forest. Lucas: It's a sex drug. What if a fox eats it and tries to fuck a squirrel? It'll kill him!


Max: We're in sixth grade now. We need to start doing sixth-grade things. Annabelle: I know what cocaine is. Max: Annabelle! Get the fuck out of here! Beanbag boys only, you little shit! Annabelle's been watching Dateline. She now knows what cocaine is. Annabelle: Hi. Max: Oh, my god! Thor: What the fuck? Annabelle: Let me a beanbag boy. I'll grow a tiny penis like Thor's. Thor: Mom!


Thor: Look what I found at school today. Lucas: What is it? Thor: I have no idea. Max: That's a tampon. Girls shove it up their buttholes to stop babies from coming out. An eighth grader told me that.


Max's Dad: I will always love you, but I no longer like you.


(Lucas sees an old man laughing) Lucas: What the fuck are you looking at, Gandalf? (an old man walks away)


Lucas: It could contaminate the water. Thor: We can throw it in the forest. Lucas: It's a sex drug. What if a fox eats it and tries to fuck a squirrel? It'll kill him!


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