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Chip Sanders: (hits Tom with wheelchair) That's for stealing my yogurt, douche.


Bob Kowalski: Why would I give you my 'yes' ball?


Tom Reilly: Market penetration strategy. Something that's very important to today's youth market: penetration.


Tom Reilly: No offense to Chip, but he's a dick!


Sofia Kowalski: (Abby March makes comment about how Sofia isn't a happy person and Abby thinks it's bad for baby Oliver) You know what I think? You're an idiot. And your son Petey... is a dipshit.


Bob Kowalski: Why would I give you my 'yes' ball?


Sofia Kowalski: You couldn't lose me even if you tried. And you've been trying really hard lately.


Bob Kowalski: (burns his hand on lamp) Fuck!
Tom Reilly: Are you okay?
Bob Kowalski: That lamp is hotter than shit!


Tom Reilly: He's paralyzed from the waist down!
Sofia Kowalski: (with a satisfied smile) Not completely!


Sofia Kowalski: Your baby's a dipshit!


Chip Sanders: (hits Tom with wheelchair) That's for stealing my yogurt, douche.


Bob Kowalski: (burns his hand on lamp) Fuck! Tom Reilly: Are you okay? Bob Kowalski: That lamp is hotter than shit!


Tom Reilly: He's paralyzed from the waist down! Sofia Kowalski: (with a satisfied smile) Not completely!


Sofia Kowalski: You couldn't lose me even if you tried. And you've been trying really hard lately.


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