The Shredder: (confronting the turtles) You fight well... in the old style. But you've caused me enough trouble. Now you face: the Shredder.
Splinter: (Leonardo meditates heavily) ... Leonardo.
Leonardo: Huh? Splinter!
Raphael: (inside playing a board game) "What Russian novel, embraces more than 500 characters, is set in the Napoleotic wars?"
Donatello: 'War and Peace'.
Leonardo: (bursting in) He's alive.
Raphael: (Leo walks right on the board game) Hey!
Donatello: Game smash.
Leonardo: Splinter's alive.
Donatello: We know, Leo, of course he is. We all think he's alive.
Leonardo: I don't *think*. I *know*.
Donatello: You're a claustrophobic.
Casey Jones: You want a fist in the mouth? I've never even looked at another guy.
Donatello: We were awesome.
Michaelangelo: Yes, Dudes and Dudettes, major-league butt-kicking is back in town.
(Raphael has just seen the movie Critters)
Raphael: Ugh. Where do they come up with this stuff?
Raphael: A Jose Canseco bat? Tell me... you didn't pay money for this.
Delivery Man: Hey, this is a 10. The tab is 13.
Michaelangelo: You're two minutes late, dude.
Delivery Man: Aw come on, I couldn't find the place!
Michaelangelo: Wise man say forgiveness is divine, but never pay full price for late pizza.
Delivery Man: (walking off) I gotta get a new route. And I thought I delivered everywhere.
Casey Jones: (to the Foot soldiers of Raph) You guys mind telling me what you're doing to my little green pal over there, hm?
Casey Jones: Oh, who is the babe?
Leonardo: Who the heck is that?
Michaelangelo: Wayne Gretzky on steroids?
Delivery Man: (trying to find address) OK, 122... 122 1/8?
(takes a couple steps to the right while checking address)
Delivery Man: 122... 1/8.
(standing in front of a wall)
Delivery Man: Terrific. Where the heck is 122 1/8?
Michaelangelo: (through the grate) You're standing on it, Dude.
Casey Jones: (about April's farmhouse) Hey, didn't they use this place in The Grapes of Wrath?
April: Very funny. I told you, I haven't been up here in years.
Raphael: Where's Splinter?
The Shredder: Ah! The rat! So it has a name...
(remembers the order to kill him)
The Shredder: It *had* a name.
Leonardo: Ooh... YOU LIE!
The Shredder: Do I?
(Leo lunges at Shredder, but he pins him to the ground)
The Shredder: He dies. Weapons. Now.
(Mike, Don and Raph chuck their weapons over the side of the building)
The Shredder: FOOLS! The three of you might have overpowered me with the loss of but one. Now your fate will be his!
Splinter: Yes, Oroku Saki, I know who you are. We met many years ago in the home of my master, Hamato Yoshi.
(Shredder removes his mask to reveal his bite wounds)
Raphael: It's him.
The Shredder: You. Now I will finish what I began with your EAR.
Thug: (of Raph) What the hell was that?
Thug: I - I don't know.
Casey Jones: (jumps down next to them) Now *that*, was a crime, you purse-grabbing pukes. And *this* is the penalty.
(knocks them over with his hockey stick)
Casey Jones: Two minutes for slashing...
(does it again)
Casey Jones: Two minutes for hooking...
Casey Jones: And let's not forget my personal favorite: two minutes for high sticking.
Raphael: (jumps in and knocks him down) How about a five-minute game misconduct for roughing, pal?
Casey Jones: Hey, Bogey... who died and made you referee? You did your job, now get out of here and let me do mine, all right? These JV low lifes need to be taught a lesson.
Raphael: Not like that they don't. Not from you.
Casey Jones: (turns to see the thugs running away, turns back) Well, it looks like you're the one who needs to be taught a lesson, pal.
(pulls out two ball bats)
Casey Jones: The class is Pain 101. Your instructor is Casey Jones.
Raphael: Look, I don't wanna fight you.
Casey Jones: Yeah, well, tough rocks, pal.
Michaelangelo: (sees that Raph has brought home an unconscious April) Can we keep her?
(after Raphael gets a mention from April on the news)
Donatello: I think he's blushing.
Raphael: I am *not*.
Donatello: I think he's actually turning red.
Donatello: (Raphael chucks a Sai that narrowly misses him) Hmm, maybe not.
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