Bert: Goodnight, fucker.
Marcy: (after having a spontaneous sexual encounter with her, Paul awkwardly informs Marcy that he intends to leave the Cabin immediately, which surprises her) What about Bert? Paul: (Agitated) I can't wait for him any longer. I have to get out of here! Marcy: Paul, what about Karen? PAUL? (She sighs, realizing that he has already gone, leaving her all alone)
Marcy: (Two of Marcy's friends have caught the deadly virus, her boyfriend has just run off and abandoned them, leaving her and Paul alone in the cabin) We're all gonna get it. We're all gonna get sick. Jeff's off in the woods getting drunk. Paul: No. Burt's gonna get help, Karen will be fine. I promise. Marcy: It's like being on a plane, when you know it's gonna crash - everyone around you is screaming, yelling "We're going down! We're going down!" And all you really wanna do is grab the person next to you and fuck the shit out of them, 'cuz you know you're gonna be dead soon, anyway. (She looks seductively at Paul, who actually is 'the person next to her')
Jeff: Hey, dipshit, what the fuck? Bert: What are you, fuckin' Smokey the Clown now? Jeff: Don't you mean 'Smokey the Bear?'
Justin: Yeah, he's a professor... OF BEING A DOG! OOOH, FACED!... Scratch moded!
Paul: So, what's the fox urine for?
Old Man Cadwell: Oh that's for foxes.
Karen: What's the rifle for?
Old Man Cadwell: That's for niggers.
Paul: Hey, where are you going?
Karen: Where does it look like I'm going?
Paul: But, well, I thought we were kissing.
Karen: Yeah, we were, weren't we?
Paul: So... you like me now? Like, is this a date?
Karen: Don't be gay.
Tommy: You bein' sick, that's your problem. Now Dennis is sick, that's my problem. And if I get sick, that's Lucille's problem. So we gotta stop the problem. We gotta stop the problem *right* now!
Tommy: Fenster, rifle!
Old Man Cadwell: Hi, my nigga, how are you?
Ray Shawn: What's up, nigga? What you doin? Where ya been, man, where ya been?
Paul: Bert, you okay? You don't look so hot.
Bert: Yeah, well, I don't feel so hot either.
(Just after a tense discussion with the group about burning the hermit to death)
Marcy: I need a bath.
Marcy: Jeff's mom has such great ideas, 'Let's get a cabin'... so gay!
Karen: That guy asked for our help. We lit him on fire. You'll understand if I'm not in a particularly social mood.
(Bert leaves the cabin with a rifle)
Karen: Bert, what the hell is that?
Bert: Huh? Oh, I'm gonna go shoot some squirrels.
Paul: Why would you wanna kill squirrels?
Bert: 'cause they're gay.
Karen: Bert, don't be a fucking retard.
Bert: I'm kidding. I don't care if they're gay or straight, I'll kill 'em either way.
Deputy Winston: Looks like you guys were doing some pretty good partying, huh?
Paul: Yeah, you know, we were drinking and then this guy came along and tried to break into the cabin. We had no choice but to get rough. I feel awful, but he was going crazy. He smashed into our car, and then he wouldn't come out, so... we had to hit him. We hurt him. We were terrified. We didn't know what to do. That's why we went to look for help...
Deputy Winston: Hey, man, I told you... I'm gonna make a report. Don't worry about it. He ain't gonna come back. Looks like you guys scared him away pretty good. I ain't gonna let him ruin your fun.
Paul: Thank you. My friend's inside right now and she's pretty freaked out. She wants to go home. We all kind of do.
Deputy Winston: A lady friend, huh? I bet you like to party.
(Group is sitting around a campfire, telling stories)
Jeff: Tell them about The Happy Bald Guy.
Karen: No, I can't take it
Paul: He was the guy that gave us our shoes and quarters for the video games. There was a room with a pool table too, but my dad wouldn't let us go back there. The bald guy was always happy, always smiling. But the killer got him too. When the cops searched the place, they found all the hacked off limbs at the end of the bowling lanes. The guy had bowled people's organs. Arms, legs, everything. They found the bald guy's head in the ball return. He was still smiling.