(to her friend after agreeing with Eric to a subtle approach) Gladys Bink: You are such a liar! (Eric looks dumbfounded) Gladys Bink: Subtle never really worked for me.
(as Annie bangs her head into a wall after being told her father is remarrying) Eric: Honey, honey, not now. I-I don't know how to plaster.
(as Eric bangs his head into a wall during a visit from both of their parents) Annie: Honey, honey, not now. I don't have time to plaster.
Matt: What's wrong with Luce? Mary: God hates her. Matt: Still? You'd think after 13 years he'd move on to someone else.
(Eric is banging his head against the wall) Annie: Could you not do that, honey? I don't have time to plaster.
Guy: Stupid Americans. Eric, Annie, Ruthie, Simon, Mary, Lucy, Matt: (all at same time) We heard that!
Simon: Okay, okay I'm flexible.
Ruthie: I don't think I'll be wearing this hat any more. Simon: (completely unaware that his sister dropped it in the toilet) Hey, I'll take it. Ruthie: Okay.
Ruthie: Martin Brewer loves me, finally.
Lucy: (after seeing Sandy's mother and stepfather) I think I liked the drunk father better. Eric: He certainly was warmer.
Martin Brewer: I made a mistake. A big mistake. Beau: Everyone makes mistakes. Martin Brewer: Not like this one... I got a girl pregnant and I'm gonna be a father.
Chandler Hampton: Female logic is fascinating.
Matt: Come on! We can't have a caper like that and keep secrets from each other. Come on! We're brothers.
Lucy: Is there anything you want to tell me? Simon: Aren't you that Camden who finds out everything last? You know, 'cause if I change something as basic to the family structure as that, this family might just fall apart. Lucy: I doubt it.
Lucy: Today, I am not your daughter, your sister or your wife, I am Lucy Kinkirk. The Reverend Lucy Kinkirk.